There is a really important tradition that seems to be slipping away in modern households- the tradition of saying grace. Now you may think that this is just a Christian tradition, but in fact it extends in some form or other to almost every culture and religion. There is certainly something to be said for giving thanks for the food we are about to eat.

This can take the form of thanking the spirit of the animal you’re about to eat, giving praise to a higher power, a small statement of gratitude that you have food on your table, or a hearty thanks to the person who made it!

In our home we use mealtimes as a chance to connect with each other, to notice the good in our lives, and to appreciate what we have, and it looks something like this…

We’ll start by checking in with everyone how their day was. Regardless of how good or bad each person’s day was, we then go around the table and each have a chance to say what our favourite part od the day was – one thing that we can be grateful for. I personally do this for myself in the evenings and find as many things as I can to be grateful for each day, but with little kids it’s easier to just notice one or two things  - the point is more to help them to notice the good even in a bad day, and to develop the habit of gratitude and looking for the positive. My husband and I will do our best to model for the kids the ability to see joy in the little things in life – the rainbow in the sprinkler, seeing the kids when we got home, a laugh we had with a friend.

We then say our form of “grace”, a little song that I made up for the kids to include positive affirmations as well as gratitude for the meal. We sing it to the tune of Frere Jacques and the kids call it The Truck Song. It goes like this:

I am happy
I am healthy
I am strong
I am loved
Thank you for the food I eat
And that I have hands and feet
Let’s gobble up
My tummy’s grumbling like a truck!

This is an exercise we use in Shiatsu classes to help the practitioners to see the importance of staying focused in the present and not letting their minds wander during treatments. You will need two people for this exercise, but it is a simple, fun exercise that can even be done with very young children.

It works like this:

Person A stands with their right hand in a loose fist. Person B places their open right hand RESTING GENTLY on top of (not hanging onto) Person A’s fist. Person B will then CLOSE THEIR EYES. With little children I would use a blindfold - they enjoy the experience, and they tend to have a hard time keeping their eyes closed on their own. Person A will lead the exercise by moving their fist all over the place, and the idea is for Person B to maintain contact with Person A’s fist at all times.

Don’t feel that you need to stay rooted to the spot and just move your hands – move around, take the other person on a journey around the room, up as high as you can both reach and down to the ground. Alternate quick movements and slow ones, sideways with up and down. Obviously be aware of furniture that you might knock into, and bonus if you can get out into a park where you have lots of space to move.

If you lose contact, simply pause for a second, find the other person, and carry on going. There is no specific time length to the exercise, but you’ll soon find that you’ll get tired enough to know its time for a break!

I use the right hand in the example, but you can obviously swap hands, and swap places as person A and B.

You’ll notice that as Person B, to maintain contact with Person A you need to be very anchored in the present moment. The minute you start thinking about something else, or getting stressed, or trying to anticipate the next move, you will lose your flow. Once you can become totally alert and focused and in the now, the exercise becomes simple and enjoyable and you should feel quite invigorated afterwards.

Play nicely!

For some reason most of us reach a point in our lives where we feel we are not good enough. We certainly don’t start off like this. If you tell most 3 year-olds that they look beautiful their standard response will be “I know”. How do we lose this sense of our wondrousness, our importance in the world, our beauty and our light? Somehow, by the time kids are in mid to late grade school, they are filled with self-doubt, and sometimes even self-loathing.

So what can we do to help our kids to grow up with a healthy self-image, one of the cornerstones of success in life?

This is a wonderful, simple exercise that even small children can enjoy and benefit from. It is based on the work of Marci Shimoff. It is a wonderful exercise to do with little ones, to get them into the habit of loving themselves early, but it is never too late to start.

Step One: Place the palm of your hand over your heart. Even just this simple gesture can start bringing your awareness from your head into your heart and is relaxing and calming.

Step Two: Imaging that you are breathing directly into and out of your heart. In other words, imagine that instead of your breath coming into and out of your nose and through your lungs, that your breath is going straight through your skin into your heart.

Sep Three: Every time you breathe in, imagine that you are breathing love into your heart. You can even imagine this as a color – a vibrant pink energy flowing into your heart on the in breath, and then as you breathe out, see it spreading throughout your body – calming you and filling you with love.

Do this with your kids at least once a day, but as many times as you feel like it.  Don’t let the simplicity of the exercise fool you into thinking that it is not extremely powerful and life changing. The more you do it, the easier it will be to get yourself into a vibration of love, which will transform your world in unimaginable ways!

I was listening to an audio replay of Deena Morton’s Four Principles and was thinking what a wonderful skill this would be for all children to grow up practicing in their daily lives.

I would highly recommend listening to Deena Morton’s replay yourself, but I’ll do my best to summarize the main points here and give you an idea of how we incorporate this into our lives and help our children to do the same.

In short, the Four Principles are these:

1.     Have a clear goal.

2.     Be others’ focused.

3.     Experience gratitude.

4.     Have unwavering faith.

It works something like this… You get a clear goal in mind, something that you would like to achieve. This can be a small goal like getting your paperwork done today, or a huge goal such as building a multi-million dollar business. Whatever your goal, you need to be able to visualize it clearly – to write it down, see it in your mind, express it in a journal or on your vision board. The more clearly you can visualize or express it, the better.

Then, put it aside for now. Don’t forget about it, but trust that the universal energy is working with you to make that a reality and so you don’t need to stress or strive to get there. Your focus now should be on others. How can you help someone else to achieve their dreams or goals? With every person you meet or interact with, make your primary focus how you can help them. This may be with a smile, a piece of good advice, something you can actually do for them, a contact you can help them to make… whatever. Keep in mind that you are not helping in order to get something in return, just helping for the sake of changing someone else’s world for the better.

Step three is to experience gratitude for everything, and I mean everything. Whatever occurs in your life is there to assist you in moving forward – do your best to see it in this light. All your obstacles and difficulties and issues have some gift to offer you. Look for the gift in everything. Take the best out of every experience. Trust that everything is happening in your best interests. Life brings you only the best. Gratitude is a very powerful force, so even if you can only find one small thing in your day to be grateful for, really feel it. Just listing things you should be grateful for in your head is not the same as experiencing the FEELING of gratitude.

And finally, have unwavering faith that your goals will be realized. Never let obstacles along the way deter you from moving step by step towards your dreams. Even when things look like they’re not working out, that you are moving further and further from your goals, learn to trust. If you are following these steps, things will work out, but they seldom happen in the way that you think they will.

Following these Four Principles will transform your life in ways you cannot even imagine, which is why I think that all children should be given this gift as early as possible.

In our family we do it like this…

Our children are still very young (3 and 5), so we focus on small, daily goals and on helping others within the family. Over breakfast, or in the car on the way to school, we all discuss what our goals are for that day. We each get a turn to say what we would like to achieve that day and all goals are accepted, no matter how big or small. My husband and I help the kids to focus on all sorts of goals by modeling this ourselves. In between our work goals, for example, we’ll express goals like having a calm day where we have time for meditation or sharing a laugh with someone. Once everyone has expressed their goals, we look at how we might be able to help each other to achieve our goals. We will also assist the kids throughout the day in showing them how they might help each other or ourselves to move forward with our goals. Throughout the day we look at things we can be grateful for, and we also each have a turn at dinner to say what we were grateful for that day, how we were able to improve someone else's wrld, and how things worked out for us in unexpected ways. During breakfast I will remind everyone that if they can see their goal clearly then they don’t need to struggle to get it – they should relax, help each other and trust that it will work out.

The Principles are really so simple, that even a 3 year-old can apply them, and as they see success in their practice of these principles they will find it easier and easier to keep applying them and to start applying them to bigger and more complex goals as they grow older. An added bonus is that as children see how they can make a difference in other people’s lives, and help each other and their parents to achieve their goals, even in very small ways, they learn to value themselves and increase their self-esteem and sense of purpose in the world.

I would encourage you to start putting these principles into practice in your own life today, and to start teaching your children to be masters of their own destinies as well!

This is a simple Chi Kung (also QiGong or Chi Gung) exercise that is fun for both parents and children and is a good introduction to energy work.

Rub your hands together as if you were warming them up on a chilly day. Once they are nice and warm, with the palms of your hands facing each other, take your hands about 1 inch apart. Feel the warmth, energy and vibration in the space between between your hands. If you look carefully you may even be able to see the vibration.

Once you can feel this, start to move your hands slowly away from each other, still maintaining this feeling. Take them slowly apart, palms still facing, until you could fit a medium sized ball between your hands - like one of those little soft beach balls with the Disney characters on it!

Feel this ball of energy, and rotate your hands as if you were holding this ball between your hands and turning it from side to side. Try pulsing your hands inwards, as if slightly squeezing the ball or compressing the energy between your hands. Have fun with this.

Once you have a strong feeling of this energy, take the ball to any part of your body that could use some extra energy - take it to your neck for a sore throat, or your stomach for some indigestion, etc - any part of your body that feels pain or discomfort. You could also take it to a part of your body that you associate with a particular emotion that is bothering you - to your heart for an intense sadness, or your liver for strong feelings of anger, for instance.

Take the ball of energy and press it into that part of your body and then rub your body with both hands, feeling the energy entering and working it's healing magic.

Try this yourself, and teach it to your kids. It doesn't need to take long -  2 or 3 minutes is fine, and so is ideal for little ones with short attention spans. They love it, and it helps to give them some feeling of control and power over their own bodies - knowing that they can heal themselves and don't need to look externally for a solution every time.

Teaching kids about cash without abandoning your faith!

Too many people abandon either wealth or spirituality because they feel uncomfortable combining the two. I found this wonderful article in the Odyssey Magazine by author and money coach, Kiki Theo, that aims to help parents to combine these two concepts for their children. Let’s create a future of kids who are both wealthy and spiritually mature.

What is Money?

-       Money is energy: it’s made of the same stuff as you, me and the stars.

-       Money is everywhere: waiting to be sung and danced to, waiting to take shape. Money is everywhere, and there’s lots of it for everyone.

-       Money is something to approach creatively: there are many ways to shape it, create it, save it, spend it.

-       Money is something light, fun and magical: it loves to make dreams come true.

-       Money can help you make the world a better place.

-       Money can make you glad, sad or mad: “no money” can do the same.

-       Money is like the tooth fairy: it comes to those who believe.

How do you create money?

-       Continue to believe in magic: believe in all the things you cannot see – dragons, angels, fairies, love, gravity, electricity, and your ability to do anything you set your mind to. One day you will use this skill to make your dreams come true.

-       Believe that you can do anything: for you are made of light, just like the angels. Before you can believe in anything, you must learn to believe in yourself.

-       Trust the quiet voice within: over all the advice and all the knowledge and all your other five senses put together. This is the voice that will keep you safe in the world. This is the voice that will guide you to money and beyond.

-       Keep your golden heart open: it will lead you to the pot of gold. It will show you the true gold from the false.

-       Believe that the world is a beautiful place: dance and laugh and rejoice in it. Life is short. Create money for useful things but also spend it on fun and foolishness and lots of chocolate.

-       Trust in the goodness of others: the divine spark lives in everyone. To create wealth you will need others to help you. Learn to find the goodness which is all around you. Be open to receive help.

-       Ask many questions: Question everything. Make changes. Change things for the better. Money is created when people try to answer new questions. Money flows to answer these questions. What questions will you ask of money?

-       Keep faith and hope alive: continue to believe, no matter what is going on around you. Keep trusting. Believe in the impossible.

-       Never give up: persist, persist, persist. But take a break to laugh and have fun. Money making is not serious.

-       Do the thing that you love more than ice-cream: What do you love doing so much that you would do it without getting paid? Do that thing, but get paid lots for it.

-       Adopt and maintain Kiki’s maxim: The less I work, the more I earn.

-       Allow money to come to you: do not stop it with foolish ideas, bad attitude or your parents’ beliefs.

-       Learn to say ‘no’: Loudly, softly, humongously, ominously, respectfully – any which way you want. Stand tall.

-       Respect the ‘no’s’ of others: but allow no no’s to stand in the way of your dreams – learn that each no brings you closer to your goal. Have courage.

-       Know that there will always be those that have more and those that have less than you: and that’s ok. You do not need to own everything you see. Don’t believe the adverts.

-       Pay attention to your thoughts: Say no to dark and negative thinking. Do not go there. Take your mind down beautiful pathways. Create beauty inside your mind. This will help you to create the things you want.

-       Pay attention to the pictures in your mind also: To create, you need lots of light. Stay away from things and people that do not add light to your life.

-       Dream: fabulous, outrageous, impossible dreams. Know that you can make your dreams come true.

-       Know that you are the one to make it happen: You create the money. You are the money.

-       Love money and it will love you back.

-       Save some money and watch it grow: you will learn patience. It takes time for a seed to become a tree. It takes time and patience for a dream to become a reality.

-       Do not spend money you do not have: You must plant seeds before you can pick fruit.

-       Give, to receive: Be generous. Recycle. Give away what you no longer want. Be kind. Listen. Give time, love, fun, laughter, attention.

-       Most of anything you will ever need in life can be had without money: we create money ‘just in case’.

-       Do not spend all of your life making money for your retirement: enjoy your money. Live life today.

-       You can love both God and money: you just need to get the sequence right.

-       Everything you need to learn about money, you already know: Trust yourself!

This article was taken from the Odyssey Magazine, Issue 2, 2011, p.63-65. If you enjoyed this, I highly recommend subscribing to this magazine – it is full of gems like this.

I saw an interesting exercise for introducing young children to meditation recently. I can’t remember the name of the book it was in and so I hope the author will forgive me for not giving them their deserved recognition, but I thought it was well worth sharing. It goes like this...

Take a jar and fill it with water.

Then take a cup of sand and let the kids add a grain of sand at a time to the water. As they do this, explain to them that the grains of sand are like their thoughts – every day we have thousands of thoughts, some are beautiful, some are nasty, but all of them are just like grains of sand, filling our minds.

Then close the jar and give it a good shake, letting the sand swirl around in the water. Explain to your children how our constant activity and busy-ness in life churns up all sort of thoughts and sends them swirling through our minds.

Then place the jar down and watch it as the sand starts to settle. Explain to them that this is just like meditation. If we take time out each day from our constant activity to just be still and allow the thoughts in our minds to float and settle, eventually our minds will become clear.

There is no effort required – if we try to force the sand to settle by putting a hand in and coaxing it down, all we do is stir up the mind again. All that is needed is stillness, to stop all our doing and just be. Watch your thoughts as they swirl around before they settle. Just watch. And in time your mind will become as clear as the water.

Even very young children can be introduced to the concept of meditation, although they shouldn’t be expected to sit still for any period of time. Let them decide when they are ready. As with anything else, the best way to entice children into an interest in mediation is to be a good example. Children who see you sitting in meditation once or twice a day will naturally develop an interest in meditation and will want to imitate you.

The practice of meditation is one of the greatest gifts that you can give to your child, so take time each day to be a great role model!

It occurred to me recently how many meals we prepare with resentment - And I do include myself in this, make no mistake. How many times are we exhausted, overworked, overstressed or simply not in the mood to prepare a meal? I’ve watched myself doing this, and others too, and have to wonder how digestible that food really is by the time we’ve poured our daily grief and resentment into it by the cupful.

I was reading about Masaru Emoto’s Peace Project on the net and if you are not familiar with his experiments, they go something like this: He takes a body of water (be that a glassful or a lakeful) and offers the water different words. The water is prayed for, or has a word written down and stuck to the glass, or shouted at it. He freezes some of the water beforehand, and some afterwards and photographs both at a high magnification so that you can see the water crystals that have formed. Those words with happy messages like “love” or “gratitude” or “peace” form the most beautiful crystals – like perfect little snowdrops. The water with negative words shouted or shown to it, things like “hate” or “you’re stupid” or “war”, form what could be called ugly crystals – they look muddy and unformed. He has even performed this experiment on huge polluted lakes, transforming the water through prayer and meditation.

Try it yourself as a fun little experiment with your kids... Take two jugs of water. Write down “love and gratitude” on a piece of paper and attach it to the one jug. Write down “I hate you” on another piece of paper and attach this to jug number two. Then take two plants – one will be watered with jug one, and the other with jug two. Before you water them, speak kindly to the water one, telling it how much love and gratitude you have and sending these “vibes” into the water. Shout at jug two, filling the water with all the hate you can muster. Keep this up for a month and see what your two plants look like.

Which brings me back to the meals. Most of what we eat, and most of what we are in fact, is made up of water. If our predominant thoughts are of negative concepts like hating what we’re doing at this particular moment, how is this affecting our food, and our health and the health of all those we’re feeding? Both the Chinese and Japanese have the concept of Qi (pronounces Chee), which says a similar thing to what Emoto is proving with his little experiments – the energy field that we have currently affects what we come into contact with. If you are kneading that dough with anger, then the Qi of anger is flowing out of your hands into your dinner.

If we are truly aiming at being conscious parents, then that consciousness needs to flow into everything we do – from playing with our kids to preparing their snacks. Try, when you’re making your next meal, to imagine that whatever emotion you are harboring while you cook is what you are serving up for din-dins.

Are you serving love or resentment for dinner tonight? It’s your choice!

Mother’s Day came and went again this year without my husband so much as making a mention of it. Our children are still too young to participate in these little events, and so we try to do something for each other to show our appreciation for our partner as a wonderful mother/father. I’m not big on needing amazing presents or trips to the theatre – a simple cup of tea in bed and a foot massage would do just fine, thanks!

But no, not a mention.

 This year, I decided that actually I am a wonderful mother and I do deserve a mention for it, and so I practiced a belated ceremony called “Appreciating Me”. I took the day off, bought myself some fantastic new pajamas, had a cup of tea in bed and even gave myself a foot massage.

I realize we can’t all take a day off every day, but I do think we could all do with an “Appreciating Me” day as often as possible. If you don’t love and approve of yourself, who else will? And if you do love and approve of yourself then you really don’t need anybody else to as well. It’s a win-win situation. And it’s something that I think mothers, in particular, should be practicing more often. Find a little something special that you can do for yourself every week – take some time off from the kids (yes, your kids will survive a morning with your husband) and do something that nurtures you – have brunch with a friend, take a walk in the park, go for a massage, spend the morning lying in the sun reading a book.

Let’s make “Appreciating Me” a standard weekly date for all mothers around the world. Trust me, by taking time out and really loving and nurturing yourself, it is not just you that benefits – you’ll come home happier, more relaxed and better able to be a wonderful mother, a fabulous wife, and I’d go as far as to say that the world in general will be a better place!

My husband’s phone rang the other day and he starts with this long whine, “Ahhh, I really don’t want to speak to him right now…”. It was the end of a long day of listening to whining kids who were now, on this rare occasion, actually asleep on schedule and I was not in the mood to have my peace interrupted. I snapped back, “Well, don’t answer it then – you’re not a slave to your phone, you know”.

A few days later there I was with a quiet afternoon of crafty activities planned for the kids and my phone rings. An hour later I’m still on it, 3 year-old hanging on my leg begging me to get on with our winter fairy crowns and I’m doing the “just five more minutes, love, I’m coming”. So I got to thinking about how much we do enslave ourselves to these mobile devices. How could I be more present with someone on the other side of the city than with my own kids in the same room?

I propose that we start a ‘Moms Minimizing Mobile Minutes’ movement – a simple pact to turn off our phones for one hour a day of pure presence with our children.

I know, I know, I’m also of the Blackberry generation where we’re practically born with speed typing machines instead of thumbs, but come on – don’t we owe it to our little ones not to let these devices get between us all the time?

I think we do.

There is nothing to sign, no-one who’ll beat you up if you don’t, but I urge you to join me in the MMMM movement and the rewards will be self-evident.